Anniversaries

Today I turned twenty three. I have mixed feelings about my birthday. I used to love birthdays, and I still get those feelings. The attention is part of it but I also just feel accomplished like I made it through another year and that is actually a pretty big deal for me. Three years ago my thoughts around my birthday changed pretty dramatically. Three years ago on October 6th a boy I had known since I was five took his own life. It effected me in a way I couldn't have imagined. We had been friends in elementary school and occasional friends, and occasional antagonists in junior high and high school. I hadn't talked to him in two years, but his death broke me down. The day he died I went to work stacking books in the library and halfway through my shift I lay on the floor and cried in the stacks when no one was there. I spent the next two months hiding. I retreated from the world I had no idea how to deal with what I was feeling. I was angry at Brad for dying, I felt so guilty that I couldn't help him and that he had died and I hadn't. I had made it through my roughest patches. In December I went to the school counsellor, I talked about it and I got better, eventually. When the anniversary comes around I get thrown back into the space I was in during that time I cry until the tears won't come anymore. I have moved on, but that experience shook my foundations. I have come out of it different than I was before some of my most fundamental beliefs shifted in the time it took me to get back on my feet again. So this time of year this anniversary, it's hard. I am brought back to a place of grief and have to take time to heal again.

Allysa

Growing up and Plans

It's time. I think part of what's been holding me back so far has been that I never quite knew what I actually wanted to do with my life. I had things figured out until graduation, but after that came the big bad blank. So far I've always had something to work for, or to look forward to, usually a set date on which I'd leave the country. I came back from the states and counted down the days for two years. I came back from Slovakia and couldn't wait for my intermediary exams to be over so I could head to the UK. Only now I have graduation, and all that's coming after that is „earn money some way.“ It is, admittedly, still „earn money some way“, unless I end up getting a translation diploma, but now it's „earn money some way to pay the rent until you earn enough freelancing to travel“. It's not much better, but, yes, better. There are plans (plans once more involving foreign places).

But now that I've figured out what I want to do, a lot of things suddenly shift into place. Twitter suddenly became a serious networking tool. Blogging suddenly turned into something business related. And down went the old crappy blogs, down went potentially embarrassing content on my twitter, away went most public content elsewhere.

It's nice to have something to work for again. It's nice to get focused for once, to finally know what I need to pay attention to, what I have to work on, when before everything was all over the place. I was learning six language at once, desperately trying to at least retain my level of proficiency in all of them. Now I'm comfortable dropping all but two, and there are once more things I can do to prepare to reach the next destination. It'll take time, and a lot of work, and most likely quite a few detours. But after years of being mildly interested in jobs I'm not quite sure I could actually do, this is finally something I know I'm capable of, 'cause dammit, if there's one thing I can do it's translate. So I might not be rich, I might barely get by, but in the end I'll do something I enjoy, something I know I can do well, something that'll allow me to keep learning, something that will continue to allow me to pack my bags every once in a while and start over somewhere new, until I get stuck somewhere that feels like home.

QotD: What are your plans?

Still an Addict

I just realized that it's been exactly 8 months since we started. I was looking at my first introduction and nothing really changed as much, i'm still addicted to burgers and i'm still working in the food industry.

I'm not really sure what else you know about me from the blogs I've been posting this past 8 months but here's 5 things that may help you to get to know me more:

1.) I don't eat pork - nothing religious, I just don't like the tastes.
2.) I turned 26 last June 1st
3.) My best sleep is when i'm traveling for long distances - I think maybe it's cause when I was a kid they'd drive me around to sleep.
4.) I love to drink coffee but I shouldn't
5.) Something new though is that I Opened my own business last May which is eating up most of my time. I now supply desserts to restaurants that wants to outsource that part of their business

Task of the Day: your turn to ask me questions of things you want to know.

Hear from you guys soon


RUBEN IV

P.S. Just saw the e-mail, I added you guys on skype =D

Limerick

Good Morning Nerdy Bunch it's Monday,

I would like to start by saying that I am never giving that introduction up, ever even on days like today when it is not Monday and not morning. Yup. Here is a limerick I wrote as part of my reintroduction.

There once was a girl named Allysa

who's mind was going to pieces

she worried and fretted

that she spend life indebted

to the government and never buy pizza.

And so I have manged to sum up my life right now and y greatest fear in a poem. Awesome. I'm unemployed and am worried about finding work because who doesn't worry about that sort of thing, being unemployed long-term is something that I actually worry about quite a bit. I generally worry a lot and sometimes I do feel like my mind is going to explode from the pressure of it all. I know this isn't much of an introduction but dealing with my anxieties is something I am having to focus on right now so you all get to hear about it.

I haven't heard back from everyone I sent out an email with my Skype name so we can try and have a little international get together. So check spam folders in case it got shunted off in that direction. Also in case you were wondering my name is pronounced Ah-lee-sah, which is very difficult to rhyme.

Best Wishes,

Allysa

waiting for winter

My old intro pretty much stands, but I liked enika's drawing tactics, so...here's some stuff that's been going on with me, in graphic form. Including me, in stick figure form.

My hair gets all messy because of static electricity. It's annoying. Also, my favorite jacket is a dark brown suede jacket. Gosh, leather jackets smell so nice. This is a very old jacket that my mom used to wear but nowadays it's pretty much my jacket, it's in amazingly good shape. Just really needs to be cleaned. Maybe one day we'll bother to take it to a professional. Maybe one day we can afford to spend money for such treatment.

Anyways, have a nice Friday!

Well, then, reintroduction time!

This is me.

I (still) study English Literature.

I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do with my life for quite some time (only that it had to be location independent), but finally figured out that literary and/or script translation is pretty much the perfect job for me. Now I just need someone to hire me.

Languages are one of my main interests, and I speak languages, but occasionally this still happens.

I live in a lovely small town that mostly consists of a university and awesome old buildings. I like to complain that there isn't much to do here, but really I'm quite fond of the place.

But there are other places I'd much rather live in (at least for a while).

I love music, good telly and good food.

Another important thing to mention would probably be the fact that I can't draw.

QotD: Is there anything weird about you?

For example, I seem to attract strangers. If you ever need to ask a stranger for directions or anything else, and I happen to be within sight, you're going to ask me. Someone once commented on this after having spent a mere four hours with me (and no, I didn't warn them in advance ;) ). Considering I'm socially awkward, never know what time it is and am directionally challenged even in places I know well, I feel rather sorry for all those people (especially the ones I've gotten lost... oops).

Re-introductions

Good morning/afternoon/evening Nerdy Bunch ^_^

I totally agree with everything said so far. But just to add to the suggestions being given, I think we should start a new by introducing ourselves again to each other.

I'm actually very excited to chat with you guys just so we can build rapport in our group.

In terms of my schedule I am hardly free, but if you set a schedule I will make sure I make space to chat with you guys. As long as the time is within reasonable hours which is anything between 10 am -10 pm GMT +8

Hear from you guys soon

RUBEN IV